One short and one not quite as short journal entry. Note: Initially, while I was reading over my journal entries, I had every intention of doing some serious editing, there are some semi personal things that I talk about in the journal and some things that are just silly to share... as you will probably read. I have decided to be perfectly honest about things and not censor though. I know I have some family on here, which is why I was initially hesitant, but whatever, they're good understanding people. Also I feel like if I skimp out on things it would not be an accurate portrait of my "life changing" quest since there is more to just running and eating that's involved in losing weight.
5/10- Ate Denny's pancakes and managed to only eat one! Letting food digest and then gong running at 10:30pm. I'm going to drive to the track though. Walking down there at night is really sketchy. Trying to cut back on smoking cigs, so far it's not really working... :( Ugh! I think I'll just go running now, or after I poop away my Denny's.
Decided not to go running. I don't think running everyday is a good idea, I feel like I'd probably get burnt out pretty quickly. So I'll stick to every other day.
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5/12- Did W2D2 of C210K-> (I generally just refer to my runs as something like 2.2).
I didn't eat beforehand so I ended up getting really tired. I still haven't eaten yet. I'm too depressed. I don't really know why, I guess because school isn't keeping me occupied. I really don't even feel like getting off my couch. I also need to finish my painting for my mom. Anywho, the run... Ran on track again; the temp was really nice. The running wasn't too bad. I did one minute of running and then four min of walking. I know I'm not ready to run more but the walking gets really old. Overall though I felt pretty shitty. However I think the next run will be better... so long as I eat first. As it is I'm negative 500 calories right now. That probably isn't good, but it makes me feel skinny. It also doesn't help that at 5:30pm I weighed 176.4! That's ten lbs lighter than I thought I would weight!!!!! I get bummed about my weight but I peaked at nearly 210 so really I've lost over 20lbs. 20 more and I'll have reached one of my weight goals!!!!! Hopefully 150ish by the end of July. My belly is still really fat. My face and limbs are losing more fat than anything. My hands are also getting more veins.
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My mentality here is obviously not a good one. If you start losing weight don't get too into it. Obviously care about it and try, but just don't develop some eating disorder or become food phobic. This has been one of my biggest problems. I'm so afraid of gaining weight back that I feel guilty about eating sometimes. This is incredibly unhealthy and using programs like Myfitnesspal.com are great for making sure you're eating enough and getting the right amount of exercise.
Running tip: EAT before you run. Not right before, but do eat. You will feel sooooooo much better and have more energy before your run! Don't consume a lot of dairy though... I ate a huge bowl of cereal once before a 5k when I was younger and threw up after my race. EAT EAT EAT!!! NOM NOM NOM! Do it kids!
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